


A Big Problem

by Dr_Psyche



Category: Sonic the Hedgehog (Archie Comic), Sonic the Hedgehog - All Media Types
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-27
Updated: 2020-04-27
Packaged: 2021-03-02 04:54:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,711
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23879500
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dr_Psyche/pseuds/Dr_Psyche
Summary: “Hello Rouge!” Big said, waving at them.Rouge was immediately struck by how different Big sounded.“It is good to see you,” Big said. “And the big Eggman robot too. How are you?”“What’s going on?” Rouge asked, directing the question to Amy.“We’ve got a small problem,” Amy said.“Small?!” Big exclaimed, jumping up from his seat. “What do you mean Small? I’m Big! Big the Cat. Not Smalls the Cat, the handsome yet destructive fellow from that alternate universe. No no no, I’m just Big the Cat. Regular old lovable Big. See?!”He smiled nervously as they all eyed him.“Uhhh, fishing?” he asked, miming reeling in a line.“Whatthe hellis going on?” Rouge asked.
Kudos: 7





	1. Chapter 1

Team Rose was on a mission to find Big’s frog, again. The frog had hopped away into the forest and Big lumbered after him. So the team had tagged along, Amy reasoning that multiple eyes could find their small companion faster.

“Froggy?” Big called, bounding ahead of them. “Where are you?”

Cheese the Chao and Chocola the Chao flew overhead, trying to spot him from the air. Behind Amy, Vanilla and her daughter Cream also searched.

“Amy, how often does this happen?” Vanilla asked.

“We’ve managed to get it down to two times a week,” Amy replied.

“Oh my,” Vanilla said.

“We can usually find Froggy pretty quickly,” Cream said. “Cheese found him last time. We like to make a game of it!”

“He can certainly move quickly,” Vanilla said, referring to Big as he pushed his way through the underbrush far ahead of them.

“Froggy! There you are!” they heard him call.

Then a bright green light blasted from the brush.

“Oh!” Vanilla exclaimed, covering her mouth.

Amy had her hammer at the ready and Cream took to the air.

“Stay back mom, we can handle this,” Cream said.

The pair headed to the brush, examining it. Several of the leaves had been charred but there didn’t seem to be any fire.

“Big?” Amy called.

“Mr. Big?” Cream said. “Are you ok?”

A shape moved up ahead and Amy pushed forward to it.

It turned to them.

Amy stopped in surprise, “What the?”


	2. Chapter 2

Rouge and Omega stepped through the hallways of the GUN Helicarrier. Dozens of GUN enforcers marched the halls, keeping tabs on the goings-on around them. Amy had paid them a visit with her team, which she said was urgent. Rouge and Omega rounded the corner to the mess hall where Team Rose had gathered. The distinctive form of Big stood out to them first. He was humming to himself and he looked… weird. Rouge couldn’t quite put her finger on it.

Next to Big, Amy Rose was pacing, looking serious. Cream the Rabbit and Cheese the Chao looked on, worried about their teammate.

“Rouge, excellent, you’ve come,” Amy said, turning to her.

“What’s this about?” Rouge asked. “You don’t tend to call me for… well, anything.”

“Hello Rouge!” Big said, waving at them.

Rouge was immediately struck by how different Big sounded, he almost sounded focused.

“It is good to see you,” Big said. “And the big Eggman robot too. How are you?”

“What’s going on?” Rouge asked, directing the question to Amy.

“We’ve got a small problem,” Amy said.

“Small?!” Big exclaimed, jumping up from his seat. “What do you mean Small? I’m Big! Big the Cat. Not Smalls the Cat, the handsome yet destructive fellow from that alternate universe. No no no, I’m just Big the Cat. Regular old lovable Big. See?!”

He smiled nervously as they all eyed him.

“Uhhh, fishing?” he asked, miming reeling in a line.

“What _the hell_ is going on?” Rouge asked.

“Do you have anywhere private we can talk?” Amy asked.

“Omega, watch them,” Rouge said, escorting Amy from the Mess Hall.

“I am not programmed to babysit Chaos, children, and… whatever Big is,” Omega protested.

But his protests fell on deaf ears. Which was quite a feat as bats are known for their impressive hearing.

When they were outside, Rouge turned to the younger Mobian.

“What’s going on?” the bat asked.

“So, Big went off looking for his Frog like he usually does,” Amy said. “And when he came back he was like that. His fur colors were inverted, he talked in a very non-Big way, and he still can’t find his frog.”

“He’s from the other universe then?” Rouge asked. “Moebius? Where Sonic is green, Knuckles is Irish, and you’re an insane gremlin?”

“I think so,” Amy said. “Every time someone so much as hints at it he freaks out.”

“What does he want?” Rouge asked.

“He keeps talking about Froggy,” Amy replied. “He wants that frog for whatever reason.”

“Could it be a prelude to some kind of invasion?” Rouge asked. “If Miles or Scourge or one of them wants to come in here and pick a fight with us?”

“I don’t know,” Amy said. “I’ve never met Big’s counterpart before. Maybe he’s a good guy? Knuckles and Bunnie’s counterparts aren’t bad guys; so maybe…”

“I don’t know if we can risk it,” Rouge said. “He’s a liability to this dimension at the very least. We should just throw him into one of the cells on the carrier, at least until we can find out what he wants.”

“I wouldn’t go that far,” Amy said. “Maybe we should just confront him.”

Rouge peaked into the mess hall. Cream had laid out a table mat and was having a little tea party with Omega and “Big.”

“More sugar Mr. Robot?” she asked.

“I am neither capable of consuming the leaf flavored liquid nor the confectionary cubes,” Omega said, sitting across from her.

“Um,” Cream scratched her ear not knowing what to do.

“I will accept the sugar, yes,” Omega said, extending the pinky of the hand he was holding the cup with.

“You know who likes tea parties?” Big asked. “Froggy! We should go back to try and find him.”

“Mr. Robot, does Big seem odd to you?” Cream asked.

“After I had first listened to the one designated as Big the Cat, I had a program installed within me to mute his voice whenever he speaks,” Omega replied. “For some reason, it is not working today. Tragically, I must now suffer as the rest of you do.”

Rouge put her head back in.

“How did he get here?”

Amy explained what had happened, “All we saw was a flash of light and then he appeared. Whatever brought him here was probably only in his dimension.”

“Maybe” Rouge scratched her chin. “Maybe Froggy is the key. You mention that he seemed to have found that frog before the light appeared?”

“Yeah, or he may have thought he’d found it,” Amy said.

“Hm,” Rouge said. “Froggy was exposed to Chaos’s essence and a Chaos Emerald a while back. Maybe whatever landed Smalls into this dimension zeroed in on that?”

“It’s a stretch,” Amy said. “We checked the area and didn’t find anything.”

“Well, maybe we should check again,” Rouge said. “This time with a robot that can pick up latent Chaos Energy signals.”


	3. Chapter 3

Rouge, Omega, Cream, Cheese, Amy, and “Big” walked through the woods where they’d lost track of the real Big. Omega was scanning the area and advancing towards the place where the lingering Chaos Essence was strongest.

“Wow, this is easy,” Amy said. “Hey Omega, can you give us a hand next time we lose Froggy?”

“No,” the Badnik said, not even looking at Amy.

“Please Mr. Omega?” Cream asked.

“… I will consider it,” Omega grumbled.

“Thank you again,” Big said. “For if not for you, I would never be able to find my dear sweet precious Froggy!”

“It’s no big deal,” Rouge said.

“Aha, yes, Big! Like me, Big! Not Small, Big!” Big said, laughing awkwardly.

“You’re doing that on purpose,” Amy hissed at Rouge.

“Yeah, it’s really funny,” Rouge replied.

The group pushed through into a meadow. To the right, there was a pond that Omega was walking towards.

“But I had checked that pond,” Big said.

“Unique currents have produced a small cave system that can be hard to search,” Omega said. “Small enough for only catfish and other little creatures. This should do it.”

Omega produced a grenade from his hand.

“Omega, no,” Rouge said.

“The frog will survive. Probably.”

“No, just tell me where he is,” Rouge said, exasperated.

Omega walked over and pointed at a spot three meters from the shore. Rouge flew overhead and dove in, easily digging into the ground. In a few moments, she burst from the water, holding Froggy.

“Yay!” Cream exclaimed. “Miss Rouge found Froggy!”

Big clapped his hands together as Rouge alighted next to him.

“Oh thank you so much!” Big said, taking Froggy.

“Yeah, don’t lose him this time,” Rouge said.

Big smiled, before opening his mouth, tossing Froggy in and swallowing him whole.

The others just stared at him in shock, except Omega who couldn’t really understand what everyone was upset about.

“Froggy!” Cream screamed, running up to him. “W-why? Why did you do that Mr. Big?”

Big threw his head back and let out a loud cruel laugh.

“You morons! I had you all fooled! I’m not Big the Cat, that stupid imbecile, I’m Smalls the Cat! You snotbrains were deceived so easily, my masterful disguise was perfect!”

“You- you _ate_ Froggy!” Amy exclaimed.

“Of course!” Smalls said. “I’ve traveled the multiverse seeking out all of the Froggys that every existed just so I could eat them! Now I’ve taken Mobius’s, the Prime Froggy!”

“M-Mr. Big, how could you?” Cream cried, running up to him. “Please give Froggy back!”

“Aw piss of you stupid little brat,” Smalls sneered, backhanding Cream. “The worst part about disguising myself was palling around with you losers.”

Cream fell to the ground, clutching her cheek and crying, while Smalls pulled a ring from his belt. The ring opened up a pocket dimension and a hi-tech fishing rod emerged from it.

“Now to cast my interdimensional line,” Smalls said. “And find a new dimension, with a new Froggy, and then I’ll-”

Smalls was cut off by Omega slamming a metal fist right into his stomach. The force was enough for him to drop his fishing rod and the impact to his belly caused him to spit up Froggy. Smalls doubled over in pain and Omega stomped on his fishing rod, destroying it.

“You are a heartless being to have made the small rabbit creature cry,” Omega said. “I would skin you alive right here if I wasn’t 70% certain that would traumatize her further.”

Smalls growled and charged forward, slamming into Omega with a shoulder check that threw the robot back.

“You people think you can stop-”

Smalls was cut off again, this time by Amy’s hammer smashing him in the face.

“Rouge you were right!” a furious Amy shouted. “We should have tossed his butt into a GUN cell and thrown away the key.”

“Hindsight and all that,” Rouge said, flying into the air and landing a powerful downward kick onto Smalls’s stomach.

Smalls recovered and slammed himself onto the ground, knocking Amy, Cream, and a recovering Omega off balance with the shockwave. Cheese flew right into his face and began pulling his ears while Rouge flew up for another downward kick. Smalls was fast this time and caught her leg; he tore Cheese off his face and threw her at Amy.

Rouge crashed into Amy and Smalls jumped up into the air, intending to body slam the both of them. Right as he reached the zenith of his leap, Cream flew at him and grabbed his foot. Smalls was torn from his drop and dangled upside down, the small Rabbit lifting him as she’d lifted Big during their adventure to stop Metal Sonic.

“Put me down you stupid brat!” Smalls shouted.

“Ok!” Cream said.

She dropped Smalls down on top of his head. The dazed cat was set upon by the other three. One flying kick, piko hit, and metal punch later; he was defeated.

With Smalls defeated, a warp ring appeared behind him and a pair of Mobians in uniform entered the field. Amy knew that they were Zone cops from the fact that they were perpendicular to the ground, walking on the sides of the nearby trees as if they were the ground. The interdimensional police had arrived to take criminals who broke dimensions away.

“Thank you for your service,” one said. “Smalls the Cat’s been out there finding and eating Froggy’s for too long now.”

The other cuffed him and gestured behind himself. Big the Cat emerged and hopped onto the grass, Froggy jumping up into his arms.

“Froggy!” he exclaimed, happily hugging his friend.

“This one was trapped on Moebius,” one cop said. “The Miles Prower of that dimension was so annoyed at his very presence he called us to pick him up. Also, forget you saw us.”

With that, the Zone Cops disappeared with Smalls in tow, leaving the group alone in the field.

“Mr. Big!” Cream exclaimed, running up to hug her friend.

“Good to have you back,” Amy said, patting his arm.

“What did I miss?” Big asked.

“I’ll tell you what you didn’t miss!” Cream said. “Dinner time! You should all come, my mom would love to have all this company!”

“Well, what do you say big guy?” Rouge asked, turning to Omega. “Victory dinner?”

“Witnessing you eat disturbs me,” Omega said, flatly.

“Please Mr. Omega?” Cream asked. “I’m sure we can give you some motor oil if that’s what you eat… er, drink.”

Omega looked to her, then to Rouge.

“Victory Dinner!” he said, pumping a fist in the air to add some emotion to his monotone statement.

And so they all went to Vanilla’s house for dinner and to awkwardly explain to her that a large man with the same appearance as Big had whacked her daughter in the face. But after calming her down, they all had a fun evening.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For anyone unfamiliar with Archie Sonic, there's a tone of parallel universes. The Zone Cops come from one that intersects with all of them so they work to keep the peace and arrest anyone who commits crimes in other people's dimensions.


	4. Chapter 4

Scourge Says:

Fiona Fox jumped up and hastily painted the words “Scourge Says” onto a large sign on top of a stage. Scourge spin dashed up next to her and quickly grabbed a paintbrush. He furiously painted over it, changing it to “Scourge Sez.”

“Hey kids,” Scourge said. “I’m a real Scourge and I’m here to give you advice! Isn’t that right, Omega?”

“Where am I?” the Badnik asked, stepping onto the stage. “How did I get here? Why did I have to be in this story?”

“Anyway,” Scourge said, turning away from the bot. “So, I’m a Hedgehog who needs no introduction. I’m sure you’ve played my games.”

“You have been in zero games,” Omega stated.

“Nuh-uh!” Scourge said, pulling out a stack of game boxes from his jacket. “Just check these out!”

“ _Scourge Adventure 1_ ”

A box of _Sonic Adventure 1_ with a cutout of Scourge’s face crudely glued over Sonic’s.

“ _Scourge the Hedgehog_ ”

A box of _Sonic the Hedgehog_ with, again, Scourge’s face plastered over it.

“ _Scourge the Hedgehog 2_ ”

Same deal.

“ _Scourge 3 and O’Knux_ ”

This was a box of _Sonic 3 and Knuckles_ but with Scourge and O’Nux’s faces pasted over the titular characters. Whoever did the job, however, mixed them up and glued Scourge’s face over Knuckles’s and O’Nux’s over Sonic’s. O’Nux’s face also had stink lines drawn on it.

“Those are Sonic games but with your face glued on them,” Omega said. “You have never been in any games because of the lawsuit.”

“Aw shut up tinman,” Scourge snapped. “I’m fucking famous! I’ve even got a movie coming! Jim Gaffigan will play Doctor Kintober, it’s going to be awesome!”

Omega was incapable of rolling his eyes so he simply glared at the green Hedgehog.

“Anyway,” Scourge said. “Sonic wants to teach the kids all sorts of lame stuff; like following their parents' rules or doing homework. But that ain’t me! I’ll give the kids real advice! Like drugs! Do lots of drugs, kids!”

Scourge smiled a fanged grin that probably looked threatening in his head.

“Scourge,” Omega said. “Can you even name 3 drugs?”

“Uuuuhhhhhhhh,” Scourge said, scratching his head.

He looked to Fiona Fox, offstage, who simply shrugged.

“Yeah, I know drugs!” Scourge said. “They’re… they’re bad for you and… stuff.”

“Riveting,” Omega said. “Can we end this segment?”

“Aw fuck you, you overgrown tin can!” Scourge shouted.

“Amazing, you can swear,” Omega said, his monotone somehow becoming even more monotonous.

“Yeah, bet Sonic can’t do that!”

“You are proud of your knowledge of bad words? You really are pathetic.”

“Oh yeah?!” Scourge said. “Uh, at least I have a mouth!”

“That is true, you do have a mouth,” Omega said. “That is an unfortunate fact that I and many many others have been forced to be aware of.”

“Whatever,” Scourge said, before turning to face the audience. “Tune in next week kids for another Scourge Sezing, and be sure to do 8 glasses of drugs!”


End file.
